This was a collaboration where I made the song and the beautiful people of the Greasytales facebook page wrote the lyrics.
lyrics
I can't find where to buy lotion, for my calloused hands,
To get the seamless cream-filled touch, that my passion demands,
I've searched far and wide across these crusty lands,
I've tried drug, super, furniture and pet stores, they don't stock my brand.
Cracked and dry, gods please hear my cry make me moist or I may die.
Can't wait for long. With calloused hands I cannot stand to touch my dong.
I want to glide like a penguin, pulling it like a tendon,
Within my hands I hold pure pleasure; I rub it extra for good measure,
A seamless piston motion,
Briny as the saltiest deep.
credits
from SEXUALOBSTER'S AMAZING ALBUM OF SIN,
track released September 6, 2016
James Brooks, Peter Thomson, Robert Antonello, Jamie Bell, Chris Svenson, Colin Lacativa, Andrew Zhu, wmfivethree, Chris Voigt
Robins decided to release the recording of his 2016 comedy tour during the Covid-19 shutdown at the behest of fans. Bandcamp New & Notable May 29, 2020
Comedian Chris Gethard’s hilarious new surprise album is devoted to the great state of New Jersey, and the great state of New Jersey alone. Bandcamp New & Notable Dec 18, 2019
supported by 20 fans who also own “Calloused Hands”
I think the most comfort I've felt in this life was being fifteen and playing this game at 2am. Words cannot describe how much this game meant to me caracalled